


i liked it better when you were on my side

by magicandlight



Series: The States [7]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 14:55:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14167344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicandlight/pseuds/magicandlight
Summary: Seven days after his sixty-fifth statehood anniversary, Timothy secedes from the union.





	i liked it better when you were on my side

_June 8, 1861_

Seven days after his sixty-fifth statehood anniversary, Timothy secedes from the union.

He hands the notice to Alfred silently.

A few minutes later, Kendall meets him on the front porch.

Kendall doesn't offer to go with him.

They both know that isn't how this works.

Tim smiles, and it's bittersweet and this can't be how they say goodbye, so Kendall grabs his collar and kisses him.

And when Tim goes to leave, Kendall pulls his necklace over his head and presses it into Tim's palm and disappears inside because he can't watch Tim leave,  _he can't_.

_February 13, 1862_

The irony is the fact that Tennessee is a confederate state and Kentucky is a union state, and yet the Army of the Tennesse is fighting on the union side while the Army of Central Kentucky fights for the confederates.

Here is more irony: a union state in blue holding a confederate state in bloody gray.

∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾

Kendall pulls Tim from the battlefield and realizes he can't take him back to the Union House.

So he changes directions, and starts heading northwest instead of northeast.

_February 15, 1862_

When Kendall had first gotten to the state house on their border, he'd been in a complete panic.

The two bullet wounds had still been sluggishly oozing blood, and somewhere in the back of his mind, he remembered Connie telling him that injuries could interfere with the reviving process.

He sets Tim down and tears through the bathroom cabinets until he finds bandages.

The next half hour is a blur of panic and shaking hands as he attempts to wrap Tim's shoulder.

When he gets the bandages on- albeit a little sloppily- he gathers up Tim's bloody jacket and shirt and after vaguely remembering something about burning the fabrics of sick people, burns them in the fireplace. 

Then he settles in for a wait.

_February 16, 1862_

Tim comes to slowly.

Not every state revives the same way. Some revive slower than others, some heal completely before reviving, some heal enough for life to be possible and then revive and finish healing.

Kendall watches as Tim's chest begins rising and falling again, and it kills him a little that he doesn't even know if this is Tim's first death. 

_∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾_

"You're a goddamned idiot."

Tim blinks at him slowly, and Kendall flushes.  _That was not what he meant to say_. 

Tim's eyes seem to get clearer, and Kendall watches as he pinches his arm. 

After a second, Tim seems satisfied that he isn't dreaming. 

"Where am I?" He sits straight up, panicked. "This isn't Philadelphia, right!? Kendall!?"

Kendall pushes him back down. "Does this look like Philadelphia? It's our border."

Tim knew exactly what he meant. There was only one state house around here, and it was on the Kentucky-Tennessee border, going towards Missouri. "Lay back down."

Tim catches his wrist and pulls him down too. Unfortunately, this means Kendall ends up sprawled over Tim, who hisses at the weight on his shoulder.

Kendall shifts his weight onto his elbows and glares at Tim. "That was your own fault."

Tim glares back, managing to look more like a kicked puppy than anything else. 

Kendall huffs, rolling his eyes, and shifts his weight again so he falls down beside Tim.  

They sit in comfortable silence for a while, Tim interlacing his fingers with Kendall's.

"How long was I out?" Tim asks suddenly.

Kendall wants to say,  _you weren't out, you were dead_. He doesn't. "Three days."

Tim moves one of his arms and then: "Kendall. Where's the necklace."

 _It's only a little funny that Tim cares more about that stupid seal necklace than he does about his shirt_ , Kendall thinks as he reaches across Tim and pulls it off the nightstand. 

He hands it to Tim, who slips it over his head without hesitation, and that in itself is irony- a confederate state wearing the seal of a union state, especially a seal that says  _united we stand, divided we fall_.

At this point, Kendall is half-sure their entire lives are nothing but irony. 

"I'll have to go back."

"I know."

_February 18, 1862_

Jackson asks where he was, and Tim freezes. 

Evangeline saves him. "He was dead, obviously. Or are you not  _nation_  enough to feel the death of one of your  _states_?"

Everything about that sentence is an insult- from Evangeline's smirk to the Cajun accent coloring it to the emphasis on  _nation_  and  _states_.

_∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾_

"Thank you." 

"I don't know what you're talking about."

_April 9, 1862_

Tim wakes up after Shiloh, and the other states give him looks like they don't know whether to pity him or be impressed by him. 

(He's racking up deaths quicker than any other state ever has.)

_∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾_

"You're being self-destructive." Scarlett informs him as she polishes the blade of a saber. 

What Tim is being is far more complicated than that. It's being pulled a hundred different directions and wondering why it's okay for his people to die for him but not okay for him to die for his people. It's taking bullets for his people and waking up and repeating, because everytime he dies, one of his people lives another day. He isn't afraid of death. 

"We're all self-destructive, in a way."

Scarlett grins. "Ain't that the goddamned truth." 

She shoves the saber into the sheath and walks away. 

_May 31, 1862_

The battle is chaos. 

Tim can sense Del- and he stays away from that side, out of the range of her righteous fury. 

He could have sworn he felt Kendall, too, but then he had felt death, and-

 _No._  He wasn't going to think about that. 

The next thing Tim knows, he's being knocked to the ground. 

"Oh, shit-"

Caden grabs his forearm, pulling him up. "Have you seen Ginny?"

Tim shakes his head, and Caden drags a hand through his hair worriedly. 

Not for the first time, Tim wonders what's going on with those two.

"Okay. You go that way, and I'll go that way. We need to find her. Daniel said we needed to  _go_."

_∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾_

For the second time that day, Tim runs straight into another state. 

This time, at least, he doesn't fall. He can't help the grin that spreads across his face when his eyes meet hazel ones. 

"Oh thank god." Kendall breathes. "I thought you died again."

Tim grins, attempts to pretend he hadn't been thinking the same thing. "What, before I saw you? Never."

Kendall offers him a faltering smile. "You- I lo-"

Kendall cuts himself off, head turning away to look away towards another part of the battle, eyebrows furrowing. 

It takes a second for Tim to realize Kendall is reacting to someone tugging on the union bond. 

Tim can't feel it at all. 

He really isn't a state anymore. 

At least not one of America's. 

Tim swallows. "I have to go. Be safe!"

_∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾∾_

Ginny is passed out when they find her, and together Tim and Caden take her home. 

_June 8, 1862_

Tim tries to hold still as Scarlett pours antiseptic over the artillery burns Chattanooga manifested as. 

He's jumps when she speaks.

"Have you seen Kendall lately?"

Tim grips the edge of the table. "No."

Scarlett dabs at the burns. "Don't lie to me."

Tim doesn't say anything. 

She secures the bandage, laying a comforting hand on his shoulder. "You should go see him."

" _What?_ "

Scarlett grins weakly. "Someone deserves to be happy in this house."

_June 10, 1862_

Kendall startles awake, and he just  _knows_. 

He yanks his clothes on, rushing downstairs. 

"Whoa, there, what's the rush?"

Kendall spins, looking towards the armchair he had just passed. 

Brooke raises one eyebrow, head tilted like an inquisitive barn-owl. She takes a sip from her coffee cup when he doesn't answer. 

When it becomes clear Kendall isn't going to answer, she rolls her eyes. "Go. Doubt I could stop you, anyway. I'll think of something to tell everyone so they don't worry."

_June 17, 1862_

It's such a bad idea that they should never have even considered it, but here they are.

They meet at the house on their border where they were raised and manage to forget for a little while that they are states at war with one another.

They shove down the list of casualties constantly repeating through their heads and ignore the burn of battles. 

They squish onto the sofa together and stay there for a few hours. 

Tim cards his fingers through Kendall's hair as Kendall plays with the necklace around Tim's neck. 

Eventually, they'll have to go back. But not right now. 

**Author's Note:**

> In case it wasn't noticeable, I was listening to The Story of Us on repeat while writing this. And later Jump Then Fall, which is just really bouncy and happy and sweet. Basically, I don't know what happened. 
> 
> This might become longer? I'm not really sure right now.


End file.
